Then they compelled a certain man, Simon a Cyrenian, the father of Alexander and Rufus, as he was coming out of the country and passing by, to bear His cross. 22 And they brought Him to the place Golgotha, which is translated, Place of a Skull. 23 Then they gave Him wine mingled with myrrh to drink, but He did not take [it]. 24 And when they crucified Him, they divided His garments, casting lots for them [to determine] what every man should take. 25 Now it was the third hour, and they crucified Him. 26 And the inscription of His accusation was written above: THE KING OF THE JEWS. 27 With Him they also crucified two robbers, one on His right and the other on His left. 28 So the Scripture was fulfilled which says, “And He was numbered with the transgressors.” 29 And those who passed by blasphemed Him, wagging their heads and saying, “Aha! [You] who destroy the temple and build [it] in three days, 30 “save Yourself, and come down from the cross!” 31 Likewise the chief priests also, mocking among themselves with the scribes, said, “He saved others; Himself He cannot save. 32 “Let the Christ, the King of Israel, descend now from the cross, that we may see and believe.” Even those who were crucified with Him reviled Him.

– Mark 15:21-32 (NKJV)

At some point everyone needs to walk through a cruel place in history. You need to sit in a place that once held slaves and imagine the terror of that place. You need to walk through a battlefield and hear the screams of young soldiers echo through your ears. You need to smell the places where evil existed in a tangible form and feel the weight of what wickedness.

I think we are supposed to sit and meditate on this passage for a while. We are supposed to feel the injustice. It’s uncomfortable. We want to get to the good part. We want to punch through to the resurrection. We want to hear the good news that, “He is risen!” We don’t like being in the darkness. We don’t like the storm. We don’t want to be around the stench of death, betrayal, forsakenness for too long… But I think the gospel demands it.

If we jump to the joys what we know are coming too soon they will be shallow joys. We won’t ever know the depth of real joy until we can feel and know the depths of sorrow that Jesus went through on our behalf. If our nostrils are never made truly uncomfortable by the stench of what our sin has borne, we won’t fully appreciate what it is to be free from it. We will treat costly grace like it is cheap token given out at a convention.

Father, We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. Give us grace to feel the weight of our sins so that we might feel the great relief of having them paid for by Christ on the cross. Help our finite minds to grasp at grace. Give us gratitude in our hearts. Let us have real and lasting joy at what it is to be forgiven. Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Now as Peter was below in the courtyard, one of the servant girls of the high priest came. 67 And when she saw Peter warming himself, she looked at him and said, “You also were with Jesus of Nazareth.” 68 But he denied it, saying, “I neither know nor understand what you are saying.” And he went out on the porch, and a rooster crowed. 69 And the servant girl saw him again, and began to say to those who stood by, “This is [one] of them.” 70 But he denied it again. And a little later those who stood by said to Peter again, “Surely you are [one] of them; for you are a Galilean, and your speech shows [it].” 71 Then he began to curse and swear, “I do not know this Man of whom you speak!” 72 A second time [the] rooster crowed. Then Peter called to mind the word that Jesus had said to him, “Before the rooster crows twice, you will deny Me three times.” And when he thought about it, he wept.

– Mark 14:66-72 (NKJV)

It was a moment of weakness. It was a night of betrayal. It was everything Jesus said would happen. Peter didn’t know the gravity of it all until it had happened until he heard the rooster crow. Then it hit him like a ton of bricks. There he was, Peter, they guy who said he’d stand beside Jesus no matter what and here he was cowering in the courtyard cursing when a young servant girl asked him if he even knew Jesus.

It took a moment for his heart to catch up with his ears, but when it did he realized the depth of his betrayal. Tears flooded his face. When he thought about it, he wept. The stone cold, brave fisherman was reduced to tears.

So why are we reading about Peter here? What does this tell us about Jesus? Jesus was right in the things he had told Peter and all the disciples before. Somewhere earlier in the night Peter chose to think that Peter was self-sufficient and that should the enemy come, Jesus would need him… He didn’t think that he’d need Jesus. So pride crept in Peter’s heart. This pride that Peter thought would leave him standing in confidence had left him weeping and frustrated with himself of having denied knowing Jesus.

Sadly, there are moments in my life where pride has crept in. I look back and am ashamed of what I thought and how I ended up. I am grateful to know the rest of Peter’s story and mine. I am grateful that Jesus restores the broken. Sometimes that’s what it takes to be really used by God, you have to know your own brokenness and his grace.

Father, We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. We thankyou for the gift of brokenness over our sin and pride. We don’t want anything standing in the way of our knowing and loving you! Help us to see ourselves as we really are. Empty us of our pride that we might receive more of you. Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.

And the high priest stood up in the midst and asked Jesus, saying, “Do You answer nothing? What [is it] these men testify against You?” 61 But He kept silent and answered nothing. Again the high priest asked Him, saying to Him, “Are You the Christ, the Son of the Blessed?” 62 Jesus said, “I am. And you will see the Son of Man sitting at the right hand of the Power, and coming with the clouds of heaven.” 63 Then the high priest tore his clothes and said, “What further need do we have of witnesses? 64 “You have heard the blasphemy! What do you think?” And they all condemned Him to be deserving of death. 65 Then some began to spit on Him, and to blindfold Him, and to beat Him, and to say to Him, “Prophesy!” And the officers struck Him with the palms of their hands.

– Mark 14:60-65 (NKJV)

They sat in judgement of Jesus, trying to piece together a case, ready to take anything evidence they could find against him. When nothing was found, they invented their own evidence. They took what he said and instead of examining it, they took it as blasphemy They had reached a conclusion about Jesus a long time ago, the trial was just a mere formality. Once they had the verdict in hand they didn’t mind torturing him according to their whims. To them it was a game. They sat in authority.

These men were judging Jesus, but Jesus would judge them. He would come on the clouds. They would see him. They would feel and know the sins of their heart on that day… So here is the thing. Jesus suffered injustice at their hands, but he would offer them justice. We can say that he was wrongly condemned but those who are condemned on that day will have to admit that their condemnation is just and right.

Yet, here is the incredible thing. Jesus who suffers injustice and will come again on the clouds with justice… offers forgiveness for those who repent and turn to him in faith! He is just in that the sentence is declared and he justifies us by paying the penalty himself.

Father, We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. We thank you for such a great salvation. We are amazed at your grace given to us. As we read this account of injustice, we are grateful for your grace and forgiveness. Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.

[Mar 14:53-59 NKJV] 53 And they led Jesus away to the high priest; and with him were assembled all the chief priests, the elders, and the scribes. 54 But Peter followed Him at a distance, right into the courtyard of the high priest. And he sat with the servants and warmed himself at the fire. 55 Now the chief priests and all the council sought testimony against Jesus to put Him to death, but found none. 56 For many bore false witness against Him, but their testimonies did not agree. 57 Then some rose up and bore false witness against Him, saying, 58 “We heard Him say, ‘I will destroy this temple made with hands, and within three days I will build another made without hands.’ ” 59 But not even then did their testimony agree.

– Mark 14:53-59 (NKJV)

When the first one of my college friends were married I took up a collection of money among the groomsmen to get a few supplies to decorate the grooms car. I entrusted the money to a guy who was a few classes ahead of me in college to go and get the supplies. He came back with the supplies and the change. I told him to just keep the change. (It only amounted to about $1 or $2 for everyone who had put in). But he said simply, “the money doesn’t belong to me, my integrity is worth more than $8.” I don’t know that anyone was really questioning his integrity, but his point was made. If we compromise on small things, it won’t be long before we compromise on big things.

It amazes me how readily the priests, elders, and scribes could assemble witnesses who would bare false witness against Jesus. This isn’t a little white lie that they tell. This is testimony in a court that could condemn Jesus to be beaten or even put to death. The words that these folks were sharing could have real consequences. It might have been a roman cross that killed Jesus, but there were some pretty shady characters who attempted to do it using only their words as they bore false witness against Jesus.

I don’t know what it takes to get to the point where you are willing to assist in the miscarriage of justice by telling lies and I hope I never find out. My guess though is that these guys had told some lies before or perhaps they were so against Jesus that they were blinded by their rage. I don’t think anyone sets out to be a Judas or a false prophet, or even to bare false witness but some people end up there.

What really amazes me is how God can use the intentions of even wicked people who are really up to no good to accomplish his purposes.

Father, We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. We thank you for the cross. We know the account of how Jesus came to be on the cross for our sins is a sobering one filled with sin and betrayal. Yet you took the works done against you and used them for our good and your glory! Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.

And immediately, while He was still speaking, Judas, one of the twelve, with a great multitude with swords and clubs, came from the chief priests and the scribes and the elders. 44 Now His betrayer had given them a signal, saying, “Whomever I kiss, He is the One; seize Him and lead [Him] away safely.” 45 As soon as he had come, immediately he went up to Him and said to Him, “Rabbi, Rabbi!” and kissed Him. 46 Then they laid their hands on Him and took Him. 47 And one of those who stood by drew his sword and struck the servant of the high priest, and cut off his ear. 48 Then Jesus answered and said to them, “Have you come out, as against a robber, with swords and clubs to take Me? 49 “I was daily with you in the temple teaching, and you did not seize Me. But the Scriptures must be fulfilled.” 50 Then they all forsook Him and fled. 51 Now a certain young man followed Him, having a linen cloth thrown around [his] naked [body]. And the young men laid hold of him, 52 and he left the linen cloth and fled from them naked.

– Mark 14:43-52 (NKJV)

The world is breaking into chaos around Jesus and the disciples as the mob comes up the hill and toward Jesus. While he was still chiding the disciples for sleeping and not praying, he noted the crowd that had come to arrest him. He didn’t even finish his sentence and they were there. The formerly sleepy disciples who had risen out of slumber were now wide awake as the adrenalin pumped through their veins. Jesus was prepared, but they were totally unprepared and the scene descends into chaos.

Judas kisses Jesus and betrays him. Over zealous Peter attempts to chop off the head of a man, misses and cuts off an ear. A young man who had been there takes off running and someone grabs ahold of his clothes and this guy keeps on running naked, in essence streaking across the garden. It is all chaos… but the one place where it isn’t chaos is in Jesus measured response. He is ready for this moment. He meets his captors head on and speaks gracefully of their opportunity.

When it seems like my world is out of control, it is comforting to know that Jesus is still in control. When I’m blindsided by something I should have seen coming a mile away. Jesus is still in control. When I’m all fear and no thoughtfulness. Jesus is still in control.

Father, We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. We take comfort in your sovereignty and grace in the midst of our chaos. We are grateful that even in your humanity, you were obedient in the most chaotic moments. We thank you for your grace when we are blindsided and struck dumb by our own ignorance. Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Then He came and found them sleeping, and said to Peter, “Simon, are you sleeping? Could you not watch one hour? 38 “Watch and pray, lest you enter into temptation. The spirit indeed [is] willing, but the flesh [is] weak.” 39 Again He went away and prayed, and spoke the same words. 40 And when He returned, He found them asleep again, for their eyes were heavy; and they did not know what to answer Him. 41 Then He came the third time and said to them, “Are you still sleeping and resting? It is enough! The hour has come; behold, the Son of Man is being betrayed into the hands of sinners. 42 “Rise, let us be going. See, My betrayer is at hand.”

– Mark 14:37-42 (NKJV)

The disciples didn’t know and so they slept! While they were sleeping, Judas was out betraying. While they were sleeping, the mob was marching. While they were sleeping, trouble was headed their way. Jesus had told them to watch and pray, but they slept instead.

The disciples would scatter. Peter would be sifted. They would all be tested like never before. They needed to be prepared, but their bodies were tired, their minds were drifting and before they knew it, they were asleep.

There is hope in this passage because there is one who never fell asleep in the garden! While they were sleeping, Jesus was praying! This story isn’t about the disciples inability to stay awake and pray as much as it is about Jesus’ ability to intercede for those he loved. Despite his companions falling asleep, Jesus was prepared for the cross. He had met the father in prayer. He had prayed for the disciples. It’s easy to read this story as a failure on the part of the disciples, but the I think the lead of the story is Jesus’ success in prayer.

Father, We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. Thank you for your grace. We are grateful that despite the disciple’s lack of awareness of the gravity of the moment that you, Jesus interceded in prayer. Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Then they came to a place which was named Gethsemane; and He said to His disciples, “Sit here while I pray.” 33 And He took Peter, James, and John with Him, and He began to be troubled and deeply distressed. 34 Then He said to them, “My soul is exceedingly sorrowful, [even] to death. Stay here and watch.” 35 He went a little farther, and fell on the ground, and prayed that if it were possible, the hour might pass from Him. 36 And He said, “Abba, Father, all things [are] possible for You. Take this cup away from Me; nevertheless, not what I will, but what You [will].”

– Mark 14:32-36 (NKJV)

I often wrestle with a battle of my wills. I want to eat healthy, lose weight, and save money. I also want to eat high calorie, high sugar foods, and sometimes I have sacrificed money for convenience. The other night I had a choice to make about my meals while I was out of town. I could go by a grocery store, buy some fruit and basics for a healthy meal, walk, and save some money or I could go by a fast food place, spend a little more money on food that was higher calorie and higher fat. I am grateful that this time I chose the extra steps and healthier option. (It’s not always been the case).

Here we see Jesus wrestle with two different wills on a much greater scale. In his flesh, he doesn’t desire the cross, the torment, and the shame that lie ahead of him… but he knows that this is the path that God the Father has laid out for him and so he submits his will to the Father’s will. We can say it was the Father’s will that Jesus go to the cross, but in a sense we can also say that Jesus was willing. This is what submission is, checking our will in order to follow someone else’s.

Oh that we would all submit our wills to God and seek to do his will! Indeed, this is how Jesus taught us to pray in the model prayer, “your will be done.” God’s will is greater and farther reaching than our wills ever are.

Father, We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. We thank you for Jesus’ prayer in the garden. We thank you for the glimpse of his humanity and his perfect submission to you. We ahve boldness to come to you through what Christ has done and we have an example of how to submit our wills to yours. We ask O’Lord for your will to be done. Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Then Jesus said to them, “All of you will be made to stumble because of Me this night, for it is written: ‘I will strike the Shepherd, And the sheep will be scattered.’ 28 “But after I have been raised, I will go before you to Galilee.” 29 Peter said to Him, “Even if all are made to stumble, yet I [will] not [be].” 30 Jesus said to him, “Assuredly, I say to you that today, [even] this night, before the rooster crows twice, you will deny Me three times.” 31 But he spoke more vehemently, “If I have to die with You, I will not deny You!” And they all said likewise.

– Mark 14:27-31 (NKJV)

I wish someone had told me early on in my ministry that leaders give into temptation when they feel strong, not necessarily when they know they are weak. I’ve learned when things are going well really well I need to lean into Jesus and trust him all the more. I’ve caught myself once or twice about to say something stupid or snarky about someone or something only to fall on my face and cry out, “Lord save me from myself!” It’s the times I didn’t catch myself and the words got out that I lament it the most.

Peter is bold, and that’s a good characteristic to have. Jesus will use Peter and his boldness in a great way, but not until Peter’s prideful attitude is reigned in. He needs to learn that when he is prideful, he is not trusting Jesus. In the book of Acts, Peter will be bold. He will stand up and be a witness for Christ. He will wear chains, be persecuted, and tradition tells us that he will eventually be crucified, but his boldness doesn’t come from bravado or pride. The difference is that in the last chapter’s of Peter’s life his boldness came from trusting Jesus.

Lord, Let all of our boldness come from you. We don’t need a false bravado. We don’t need pride. We don’t need to be bullheaded in our circumstances. We need to be firmly yielded to you. Give us the grace and strength to submit our lives wholly to you that we might be used by you. Thank you for the lessons we learn the hard way through poor choices in our circumstances and thank you for the grace to learn lessons the easy way through trusting you and applying your word to our circumstances. We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.

And as they were eating, Jesus took bread, blessed and broke [it], and gave [it] to them and said, “Take, eat; this is My body.” 23 Then He took the cup, and when He had given thanks He gave [it] to them, and they all drank from it. 24 And He said to them, “This is My blood of the new covenant, which is shed for many. 25 “Assuredly, I say to you, I will no longer drink of the fruit of the vine until that day when I drink it new in the kingdom of God.” 26 And when they had sung a hymn, they went out to the Mount of Olives.

– Mark 14:22-26 (NKJV)

The pastor stood up before the congregation and he asked a question that changed my world forever! I didn’t feel the earth move, but I knew it was a special moment…. It was the moment at our wedding where the pastor said, “who gives this woman to be married to this man?” and my wife’s father put her hands in mine. In that brief moment, we left our families and became our own family.

On one level it was a pretty normal day and nothing much really changed. But on another level, everything changed. When Jesus is speaking to the disciples they are celebrating a Passover meal where they remember how God delivered the Israelites from the Egyptians. There was a lamb who was killed. Blood was put over the door post. The angel of death passed over… It was a regular holiday filled with meaning for folks then (and now), but Jesus changed something.

When it got to the end with a bit of bread and wine he told the disciples that these two elements now represented his body and blood.* Something fundamental was changing. Jesus would give his life so that we could receive eternal life.

We now take these elements on a regular basis to remember what Jesus has done. This celebration has meaning because Jesus did something meaningful. We don’t always see it or feel it at the moment, but for those who genuinely have put their trust in Christ as Lord and Savior, when ever they partake of these elements, they are remembering that their world has changed. It is through Jesus’ sacrifice that we are welcomed into the family of God.

I love celebrating the Lord’s supper because as we come to the moments where we receive the elements we are saying that our relationship with God has changed. We are no longer separated from God, but we have been adopted into the family of God. We gather at the family table and celebrate the meal that God has provided for all who have received him into their hearts.

Father, We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. We thank you for the cross. We thank you for the Lord’s Supper and the meaning that is packed into it. We are grateful to be part of your family. Thank you for saving us from our sins. Our hope is in you! Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.

*(part of the reason I believe that these are symbols and do not become the literal blood and body of Christ is because Jesus is the one handing them out to the disciples. It’s apparent in a regular reading of the text that these things don’t become his body, but are symbolic).

In the evening He came with the twelve. 18 Now as they sat and ate, Jesus said, “Assuredly, I say to you, one of you who eats with Me will betray Me.” 19 And they began to be sorrowful, and to say to Him one by one, “[Is] it I?” And another [said], “[Is] it I?” 20 He answered and said to them, “[It is] one of the twelve, who dips with Me in the dish. 21 “The Son of Man indeed goes just as it is written of Him, but woe to that man by whom the Son of Man is betrayed! It would have been good for that man if he had never been born.”

– Mark 14:17-21 (NKJV)

It seems like a million years ago that cassette tapes were being replaced by CDs and our youth group had a brand new CD Player. The cool things about CD’s is that you didn’t have to rewind them. You could punch in a number and that song/ track would play. It was great, until someone stole the youth group CD player. There was plenty of blame to go around. Our youth group just about fell apart because everyone suspected everyone else of having stolen it. We never did get to the bottom of it, but the truth is, we were all suspects because we were all sinners. Our pride wouldn’t let us admit that we at least had the capacity to steal, but we all did.

What amazes me is the disciples reaction to Jesus when he says that someone will betray him. They didn’t jump up and down and deny it and say “I’ll never betray you Jesus!” They each went to Jesus asking if it was them! They spent enough time in the presence of Jesus to know their own capacity for sin. Perhaps they had seen Peter fall flat on his face in front of the group so much that they knew better than to make any kind of definitive statements.

The disciples also grasped the seriousness of this moment. They were sorrowful. One of them would betray Jesus! and each thought themselves capable.

I wish our youth group had a different response when the CD player went missing. Instead of blaming one another, we should have examined our own lives and understood that we were all capable of such a sin. We still probably wouldn’t have found the CD player, but we would have still been united.

What a gracious response on part of the disciples. Instead of pridefully assuming blame on others, they individually come to Jesus with a simple prayer, “is it I?” as if to say, “Search my heart O’ God! I don’t want it to be me, but if it is me, please fix this part of me!”

Father, We love you and want to grow in knowledge of you and your word. We see a profound reaction of your disciples to the word about your betrayal. We cry with the Psalmist today, Search my heart O’ God and see if there is any wicked thing in me. We ask for clean hands and pure hearts. When hard things like betrayal happen, we ask for grace to walk through it all. Give us discernment as we apply your word to our lives. In Jesus Name, Amen.